I am not a tree but my mind is and it is a problem

Good Evening all,

How are you all doing? Things have been tough lately right..With what is happening in the world, in our lives, everything look hazy. 

Same for me here. I am at the rig, another rig at land this time. I got off from Rig Halul last time on 8th November. Managed to get some rest and immediately had to depart to GDI-1, land rig on 14th. 

Between 9th to 13th, a lot of things I had to do like just to be normal person. I did laundry, home cleaning, some shopping, watching movies and had to do swab test and renew my medical checkup as well. 

Me on this side, Claudia on another side

I cut my finger as well, no actually I spliced my fingers. Two finger, left and right but the worse was left. It was at night and I wanted to cut ginger, I just hold it and not using the chopping board. Booom! I cut left one, and during that time I did not know how the right finger also got cut.

It was scary as fresh blood coming out from both hands I did not know what to do. I tried walking calmly to my room to get minyak gamat but the one on the table was finished. The blood dripping all over the places in the meantime. Another bottle of minyak gamat was in the closet. I ended up had to call for Claudia from her room. 

This is what I have got and used for two nights, wrapped with kitchen tissue and rubber. I wet the tissue with minyak gamat so the wound will be wet with it at all time while sleeping.

She surprised and helped me to open the minyak gamat. I was shaking as well at the same time because of shock as well as pain. That happened.

Next day I had to do medical checkup and swab test. I was thinking I will get the proper wound cleaning there.

I wrapped like this before going to medical check up and swab test. It was too bulky and I cannot hide it.

On 13th morning around 10am, I was told all the crew will depart to land rig at 3pm on the same day. I was not happy at all, as my finger still wounded and I limit the pressure I put on my hand. So how come I can pack my bag and carry it to the rig..So I said I will need 24 hours' notice as I was thinking to go to the clinic later in that same afternoon. 

I managed to stay one more day and departed to the rig on 14th.

Claudia has been taking care of my plant since I left. She even bought this spray to water the plant. It is growing big and I am thinking to rod to make support when I am back in Doha.

For me, at that time and even now I feel disappointment. I don’t know, I feel disappointed with myself why I still in this situation when I hate it?  

This quote regarding tree came to my IG timeline from Fynn Jamal couple of weeks back..I have been thinking about it most of the time.

I have no guts to change I would say and it is very disappointing.  

Publicly, people has been complaining about the jobs, workload, and how are things being done but none decided to move on. Even encouraged others to cry out loud. I spoke to my colleague, in reality none put a bullet in our head to stop us from walk away. However, why we complain so much?

I have been stop whining publicly since May or June. I don't find it anymore fun when I complaint and nothing happen. Because in reality, it is me who make a choice of doing what I am doing. 

I know it is dumb, but I just swallow for now and in the meantime working on the plan.

That's the update I have now...I will see you all next time.

Salam wbt and take care.

P/S - No P/S this time.