My halfway MBA journey

Salam wbt and hi readers,

In this entry, I would like to share what I meant in the entry 5 stars to 0 star here. 

Mid of last year, I was idle and got bored for nearly three months. I was looking for ways to make my time more useful thus I ended up enrolled for MBA - Energy Management Online Distance Learning (ODL) at University of Petronas. 

To stop you from being overly inspired, I will give you heads up. Now I am no longer enrolled in it. I dropped within 2 months into the course, I will explain the reasons shortly. 

What initiates this? 

I was being idle for 2 months in Doha due to Covid-19, lockdown, staying in apartment as no jobs available as operations halt. I tried to learn myself, the LinkedIn offered free courses, I joined it religiously for 1-2 weeks. Then I was bored. I was thinking, if this situation keep going on for another 2-3 months it is better if I commit to something solid. 

Claudia, my apartment mate has been doing Master via online for years since I met her. I am impressed she could do it. So I decided to give it a try. I searched for the courses, online website, national and international universities who can offer distance learning. I was also taking into account the money and cost as I am not willing to pay 100% upfront for the entire course just in case I dropped it if I don’t like it. I contacted my old mate who is no longer with SLB. He is doing MBA as well and at UTP. He shared the pamphlets about the course, fees, and all the information. Unfortunately, the course already start for the first week and I will need to catch up fast. 

Did I enroll?

Yep, I enrolled it. Made a deposit, had a quick introduction meeting via Team with the program coordinator, and proceed to join the online class during the weekend. I forgot to tell you, it was 3 courses in the semester and each course will take 4-5 hours each weekend. Basically, 1 course will be done within 4 consecutive weeks by spending 4-5 hours on Saturday/Sunday. 

It was fine with me for the first couple of 4-5 weeks. As I was not working, I have time get ready, study the materials throughout the week and have questions prepared during the class.

It was getting tough

The first course was Operation Management, it was educational and I could relate it very well. The next course was Economics. Throughout the first week before the lecture, I got time to prepare myself and since it was introduction to Economics during the first class, it was not that hard. 

I proceeded with the second, third, weeks. During this time, I was already at offshore rig. The materials getting more complicated, and I did not have enough time prepare as I had to work as well. I was doing night shift. Besides, I don’t want to mention this, however I did not like the way this lecturer taught the student. I think that was his nature, as other student who might already know him finds it is fine. For me, it was weird because he could scowl (my impression towards him) during the class. Well, maybe because of the online learning, I failed to interpret his response properly.

This Economics class also had a weekly assignment, which is due at very tight times. With my current job, extra homework, and uninteresting classes, I could no longer cope with it. I tried, and resulted me being very exhausted during my shift.

Tried again

I tried again to join the third subject, I don’t remember what was the name but I think it was related to energy. I only joined once - the first class. As this type of class, always had quiz in the first hour of the class. 

I was like, there is no way I could do this. 

Apart from that, being at the rigsite I lost count of the day and time. Especially doing the night shift, I mixed up between days unless I properly checked the clock/calendar. I am telling you, it is common for whoever working in the field to lost count of the day. On one day, you checked it was Saturday and suddenly it was Thursday. Time flies.

The point is, I also missed the class because I did not realize it was weekend. 

Assignments and exams

Since there were no typical exams, the end products will be a mini thesis or equivalent on top of weekly assignment and quizzes. All three courses require quite similar end product which I had to submit at the end of the semester, sometimes in September. I am sorry, I don’t remember the date. 

Since I could relate well with the first course - Operation Management, I said to myself, let's try focus all my efforts on this course and at least, pass it. I read like 20-30 journals to gather the material for the end product - mini thesis. It was tough for me, as I was learning on how to read and understanding the journal/research papers, at the same time I had come out with my own summary.

You need to understand as well, I completed my bachelor degree 6 years ago and I straight joined the workforce which is more practical, not theoretical or research background. 

By this time, I already paid the commitment fee and full semester fees. It was around RM6000-RM7000. 

My realization

Finally, I realized I was not enjoying it. I was struggling and I had sign up for unnecessary pressures to "fill up my time". I decided to work on my exit strategy which was withdraw from the course. 

I did not speak to the program coordinator because I felt guilty as she was the one signed me up at a very last minute. I dropped an email to Uni helpdesk to withdraw me. Also, I asked if it is possible to have refund, or at least 50% out of the fee. No reply but I know I was no longer in the course.

My ex-SLB mate tried to contact me, but I bear no responsibility to explain my situation to him. So I remained silent and my assumptions, he will understand it over time. 

Did I learn anything at all?

Indeed! I learned many things throughout this short period of my "halfway MBA journey" and I understand myself better.

• I now realized and understand, there are other things going on outside of current work scope of field engineer in oil and gas industry. I did not realize it, to put it better, I was ignorant to learn other things apart from doing my job. I was at loss.
• I understand when I am doing something I am not enjoying, I was struggling, very much. At some point, I was feeling it as a burden.
• Learning should not be a burden, if I think it as a burden then I am definitely not on the right paths. 
• Online learning was way different as we could have mistakenly interpret the person.
• Ultimately as for now, I understand I am not going further to advance my academic achievement as I now fully know I am not committed to it and I don’t have passion towards it. Hats off to individual who were able to do this up to PHD level. I cannot imagine myself on that path.

I am grateful to finish my degree. Final year was terrible in many ways.

In the end, it does not matter what qualifications you are pursuing, as long as you keep your passion to learn lit up, you will do well. For me, I am still discovering the road I want to take on. 

Take care and Salam w.b.t

P/S - I finished reading the fourth book for this month, The Timekeeper written by Mitch Albom. It was full of lessons learned about time, and from Quran, Surah Al - 'Asr reflects very well with the lessons portrayed in this book. Indeed, mankind is in loss.

Happiness is a Choice

Salam w.b.t and hi all,

Today, I started my shift. I am doing night shift now. 

I came in and briefly chatted, the day engineer, i.e. my trainee commented, "Why you looks so happy?". 

Maybe he could sense my energy was different. My immediate answer was, "I just woke up from sleep and still have plenty of energy to start my shift". We proceed with handover and now here I am writing this piece. 

I reflected about his comment. 

I do not have any particular reason why I was happy. I just woke up from sleep and that’s it. 

Then I remember, I read something similar saying "Happiness is a choice". 

Unconsciously, I probably decided to take it easy today and be happy. Then it reflected on my appearance and spread across the room. Alhamdulillah, I am breathing and happy. 

I am at the rig, same land rig and today is 5th day. I got about 6 days in town although it was really not days off. Been calling to the base for tools preparation for two consecutive days right after coming from the previous job, certificate renew at training center, swab test. I had barely had time to rejuvenate. I asked why no other engineer as I was exhausted. I came back late every night to apartment. This is too much. Several issues as some engineers were in quarantine, positive Covid, no other senior engineers.

Even one late night, the manager called me to inform I had to come to the base on the next day. I barely had room for myself and this time, I said No. I need rest and he understood. Finally, I managed to get two days for myself.

I finished this. It is very inspirational.

Apartment I currently staying will due in 3 months. All SLB employee were supposed to be kick out from the apartment in November and moved to the opposite building. However, the notice was last minute and everybody pissed off. Since many personnel at the rigsite, out of country, quarantine, etc. They cancelled it and decided lets move in the next three months. Unfortunately, this circus shows by SLB may happen again - giving us late notice. My apartment mate and the rest of the employees does not want to fall into this idiotic trap again, packed our stuff in advance. 

I did the same. I looked for boxes at the base, market, and shops. I packed my stuff. 

 

While packing, my mind was partially hopeful these packages are actually I am packing to go home for good.

I scrapped many things I no longer needed, papers, notes, junks. Some of it I feel like I need it, but as per Marie Kondo keep things that make you happy. 

I had old glasses. I threw the above three as the power is no longer suit me.

The money plant still growing well. You see the small building on the background? Thats where we supposed to move.

Yesterday. We pulling out of the hole due to poor ROP. Nevertheless, we took picture to capture the moment. 

I have many things going on in my mind. There are many uncertainties. Future is full of mysteries. 

I read the Shoe Dog, I find it is very strong book and motivating. However I am nervous. 

I don't know what I am trying to say now. When I have something solid to share, I will write here again.

In the meantime, please take care and stay strong. 

Salam w.b.t.

P/S - It is freezing cold here now in the desert. It is winter. The rig location is now on the hill/mountain, 177ft above the sea level. The terrain looks good for hiking. I will take pictures and share it later.