Hi All

Salam wbt and hi guys.


It has been a while.


Nothing much interesting going on with me so far.


At the moment, I am at the rig known as Mick O' Brien. First time here and I have been here nearly two weeks.


It has been slow and steady operation.


I don't really like the environment at this rig.


Maybe it is new rig to me, new client, new crew. So I am not used to.


Since it is slow and steady environment, I have been using this opportunity to look for something else.


I applied for New Zealand scholarship - It got rejected. It is ok.


I applied for several jobs on LinkedIn. This has been routine by spending 2/3 of my shift doing this.


Scrolling and looking for opportunities to pursue studies at higher level. However, I am not sure what course I want to do without the feeling of I will be struggling.


I also have been thinking of the next job I want to go for. One of it is project engineer, in my perspective I will get opportunities involved with bigger subjects and widen my spectrum. Planning, decision making, making changes, and contribute.


Not just doing MWD Engineer thing - Repeat and repeat.


However, I do not specify the sector of the project engineer I want to be. The shortfall from this, I don't know what skills, certifications, qualifications, and experience required to fit into this position.


Applying jobs everyday wont land be a better position if I don't have what is required, right?


All I know, I want to do something bigger and contribute significantly to this.


But, I don't know how.


I think I will need external mentor to guide me.


I am totally blank.


I am with one of the MWD Engineer name Elaine, she is resigning and will leave soon.


This really strengthen my desire to find something better, and value added to myself as well as future development.


Previous month, I was working with Putri. She is now ex-SLB as she joins the client's company.


I mean, I will be over the moon if I can be the third engineer putting the resignation letter and go to another company. Right now, the current role is like working in the circus and doing a monkey business.


Maybe I don't fully understand of what is happening, regardless I don't want to spend another year to be in the stage of understanding. By that time, I will regret and saying I should have left earlier.


I am working on it to the direction in finding another jobs.


I want to achieve more, and I could not do it here with my current unexplored capacity.


I am welcoming any advices, insights, and guidance from you. I somehow feeling stupid.


Thank you all for reading.


Till next time.


P/S - Nothing to PS

It is no longer exciting

Salam w.b.t and hello guys,
If you noticed, this is my third entry for this year. I have been thinking and spending some amount of time in writing.
I am at the land rig, by the way since 29th Jan. I am here with Donnique, she is a new trainee. This is her third job after she arrived in Qatar, and her second hitch with me. She is fine, and still learning. Keep going as I keep telling her.
Do the job, make mistakes, learn from it. It was tough for me at the start to train a brand spanking new trainee, but it is fine.
Anyway, I am not writing to talk about the trainees. I would like to talk about what has been bothering me for the last 2-3 months.
I think I am starting to live in a routine, again. If you remember, 3 years back I had the same situation and I shared it on my blog. If you don’t know what I am talking about, here is the link: Tough Times
What I am doing right now as a field engineer starts to make me bored, truth to be told.
This is the same thing I have been feeling, and it is about to enter the third month.
You see, I am working as a field engineer based in Doha.
Overall, prepare the tools, tool calibrations, wait for any calls for job, then go to the rig, work. At the rig site, as usual drilling operation with I am doing 12-hours shift. Work for 12-hours shift, deal with whatever I have to deal, and finish my shift. Then go back to sleep.
The cycle continues….for how long? 2-3 weeks if it is a complete well.
Then go back to Doha repeat the cycle.
It starts to become a routine.
During the first year in Qatar (2017), I felt everything was very new and I was so busy in catching up with the jobs, meeting expectations, and all. So, I did not feel it as a routine.
Then, came a second year (2018), it was ok. Started to do the job on my own and understood most of the stuffs. Not a big struggle, workwise. However, half of my second year was influenced by my family. My sister was unwell, had to go for surgery, emergency leave, taking care of my mother, she is also a bit unwell now. I also had a muscle spasm at my neck and limited my movement as it affected my physical movement. It was painful. At the time, my job was like a background process. Yeah, I need money to support my life, but at this point I started to think "Is it really worth it?". Am I going to be like this for the next 2-3 years?
Now is my third year. I am starting to feel everything is no longer exciting. I mean everything. Job, Doha, people, money, environment. Everything.
I have been questioning, is this what I want to do for the next 1 month? 2 months? 6 months? Am I going to go through the same cycle again and again until year ends if I am lucky?
It starts to feel the same, I don’t feel the challenges anymore as I can read and already have my expectations of what will happen. I tried to push myself further, learn more, get promotion, increase in salary that kind of thing, but no.
I have tried many times.
Put money as my motivation - No success. I am not saying I don’t need money. But, whatever I earn right now is enough if I spend it wisely. So, money is no longer become my first and strong pulling factor.
I already voiced out my desire for relocation to my mentor so called manager, Farhat. At first, I explained I want to learn new things, tools, work with different clients as I already start to feel bored at the current client. Same politics, same people, same thing. This makes me to enter the comfort zone, and for me it is really scary. As that when I will start taking things easily and make mistakes.
If I am a good engineer at what I am doing, that’s good. However, my potential is not fully stretched yet.
I want to go somewhere else, different people, new environment, new challenges, and learn new things. Send me for loan to another locations, outside of Qatar, wherever. If there is no other place, it is ok, I can go back to Malaysia. However, I still want to work outside of Malaysia for another 2-3 years.
Deep inside me, I really want to move to Australia in particular, Perth. I miss this place so much. I don’t know why, but every time I think about this place, it makes my eyes teary. Even right now when writing it. I think as I grow older, I start to become emotional easily :')
Unfortunately, relocation is not an immediate solution and the way I see it, it is really far for me to reach it and frankly, I don’t even know if this is possible. Therefore, it hardly motivates me to keep going.
All in all, I have lost my motivations. I could not find any driving factors to push me forward.
Therefore, I do what I am doing just because I am doing it.
The last thing excited me was my time in Istanbul. In particular, the moment I stood at Halic Station where I can see overall of Istanbul. That was the moment I confirmed to myself, I made a right decision of coming here. That was the last time I felt full, last 19th January. 
I am in dilemma, really am. I am thinking to take unpaid leave for some time and embark on self-discovery journey, leave all these behind, try to figure out what I want to do and understand more about myself.
I don’t know.
I am lost. That’s affirmative.

Short Vacay to Istanbul

Salam w.b.t and hello dear readers.

How are you doing? I am doing fine. So now, I would like to share with you guys my trip to Instanbul recently.

First off, Istanbul is lovely and amazing place.

I have been in Doha for one week, doing nothing, none calls for job, sleeping, eating, movies, and on Thursday (17th Jan) that’s when it hits me. I need to do something, I cannot just wait for another week to go to a job. I was thinking, whether I want to do Skydive in Doha or go somewhere. The price of skydiving was ~ QR 2100, quite expensive and I don’t have anybody to do it with me. Called Kanoon if she is Aberdeen so I can visit her, ironically she was in Norway waiting for a chopper to go to the rig.

Then, deep inside me there is one place I really wanted to go - ISTANBUL.

Quickly google for flight fare, local time so I don’t have to deal with jetlag, weather, and ask the coordinator of how many days I will be idle. I will need at least 5 days, 2 days of travel and 3 days for exploring. That’s it, I booked the flight to travel to Istanbul on the next morning. Before that I called my mother to inform her. She said, "Go, go. Explore and don’t stop now. Go but ensure to keep me updated your whereabout from time to time".

I told her, "Ok Mak (mom), but it is last minute plan".

She said, "Just go, last minute is always your plan".

Hehehe…

I booked the return flight, hostel, and listed down the place I wanted to visit. It will be from 18th Jan to 22nd Jan, excellent!

Following is the flight details. There are several airports in Instanbul and the ticket price is also different. Therefore, ensure you select the correct airport for your arrival and departure. I contacted the Malaysian student there, it is best to land at Atartuk Airport.

Qatar Airways, ~ 4 hours flight

For the accommodation, I booked via the Booking.com. Since is the last minute trip, I would like to save money on this part. So, I decided Dorm is fine. The thing I was not aware of was that this Dorm is a mix gender. *Face palm*

Click the link below to know more about the hostel I stayed in. You can choose what type of room you want to stay in.

Antique Hostel, Sultanahmet

Overall, it was great, and the location is right behind the Sultanahmet Mosque. I had my Fajr prayer throughout my stay and Isyak prayer two times. So, it is an excellent choice.

Itinerary of my trip as following:

Friday, 18 January 2019 - Blue mosque, Hagia Sophia, Hippodrome, Sultanahmet Area

Sultanahmet Mosque also known as Blue Mosque

I arrived in Istanbul. From the Atartuk Airport, I took a Metro (M1) towards Yenikapı then get off at Zeytinburnu. From this station, took a tramvay towards Kabataş dan stop di station Sultanahmet.

Roughly one-hour journey. From Sultanahmet, I just walked to the hostel. This was the trickiest part, so I asked around for the direction while dragging my luggage with me. I passed by Blue Mosque, Hagia Sophia and many tourists - everywhere. I arrived in the afternoon around 2PM and one thing I saw was, many policemen, armies with tank, jeeps, vans, guarding the area with the guns. They were guarding the perimeter then I realized, it was Friday and they just finished Friday prayer. So, I just walk with calm as I did not want to attract any attention.

After checked in, got myself clean, then I went to Blue Mosque. I waited among the tourists as they have specific time for visitor to enter the mosque. I wanted to enter then the security asked, is it for praying? I said no since I have prayed at hostel, just want to see inside. Security said wait at 4.15PM.

Then this is the view at 4.15PM.

This is right after the door for visitors was opened

Then I just visited the Sultanahmet area. Went to Hagia Sophia, Hippodrome, walked around the streets.

Hagia Sophia

I forgot to tell you, it was winter and freezing. However, it was not raining and you can still walk around visiting the places. Just be sure you bring your thick winter jacket. My winter jacket was left in Malaysia, so the night before I bought a thick winter coat.

Saturday, 19 Jan - Ortaköy, Besiktas, Dolmabahçe Palace, Taksim Square, Galata Tower, Haliç

This is the view at Ortakoy.

This is one of the gate at the side of the palace. This is not the palace itself.

Galata Tower

View from Halic station during sunset. This was actually the time I felt like crying of happiness for making the decision to come to Istanbul.

Sunday, 20 Jan - Eyüp Sultan Mosque, Pier Loti Hill, Panorama 1475, Ferry by Asia-Europe Istanbul

Eyüp Sultan Mosquei

View from Pier Loti Hill. Around the hill is the grave. If you still remember, there was one Malaysian student, Allahyarham Ammar passed away. His grave is somewhere on this hill.

The wreck of the walls that cover the Old City. Panorama 1475 will explain the history and how Sultan Fateh managed to conquer Constantinople.

Took a ferry from Kardikoy to Asian part of Istanbul. The strait is known as Bosphorus Strait. This is the powerful and most important strait for business from old days until now.

Monday, 21 Jan - Süleymaniye Mosque, Grand Bazaar, Spice Bazaar, Mahmud Pasha Bazaar, Basilica Cistern, Gülhane Park.

Süleymaniye Mosque. Amazing architecture.

The mosque is located on the hill. Then we walked down the hill go to the bazaar. Started with Grand Bazaar, then Spice Bazaar, finally Mahmut Pasha Bazaar. I did some shopping at the Bazaar. Believe it or not, the sellers know to speak Malay and tourists from Malaysian come here quite a lot.

Recently painted to make it pretty. This is Mahmut Pasha Bazaar.

I came here in the evening. Since Hagia Sophia closed, I just walked around Sultanahmet area. This park is next to Topkapi palace.

Tuesday, 22 Jan - Travel back to Doha. From Sultanahmet, I took the same way I came to my hostel by tramvay - metro to the airport.

Overall, it was amazing experience. The only part I was missing is to enter the Hagia Sophia. At first I thought I will visit it on Monday, but it was closed on Monday. That was the thing I did not check when I did my planning.

The food, price is quite cheap compared to Qatar. It is affordable. I think I will come again visit Turkey, come to visit Hagia Sophia and then probably travel to Cappadocia and Pamukkale.

I am grateful for this opportunity

It was really refreshing journey, full of history, and I feel great to see this place myself. I learned about the history when I was in high school. Then over time, the appreciation went by. Now it is like a reminder for me not to forget how the previous leaders build this place, the victory of Islam, and many more.

I think this is it for now. I hope all of you will get a chance to visit Istanbul one day.

Till next time.

Take care and Salam w.b.t.

P/S - Where is next?

Entry after a while

Salam w.b.t and hello dear readers.

Honestly, I have left this blog not updated for quite some times. Nearly 7 months with nothing.

What???

Why is this happened? Why?

I don’t know. It is always behind my mind, "update it, update it". But I keep delaying it - procrastinating. Apologies for this unacceptable sorry behaviour.

I will update it now. Working, as usual.

Not much going on with me right now. That’s not true.

Actually, I went to Istanbul last week. Istanbul is really amazing place.

They said Paris is City of Love or Romantic City or whatsoever. For me, Istanbul is the City of Love. When I first arrived, I felt in love straight away with the atmosphere that welcome me here.

The weather, people, view, buildings, atmosphere, and many things. You know, when I first get out of the airport I took the train. Once I saw the surrounding, I feel refreshed. It was like breathing fresh air into your respiratory system (LOL, biology. Nerd…).

I flew from Doha on 18 January and go back on 22 January, 5 days 4 nights. Istanbul is simply amazing.

Let me share the pictures.

The view across the border between Baghdad and Iran.

Mosque Sultanahmet or famously known as Blue Mosque

The mosque at dawn, lovely

Hagia Sophia, opposite to the Blue Mosque.


I rent a dorm close to the Blue Mosque, 500meter on foot. Everyday, after I get off the train I will pass by these two amazing architectures. They are opposite to each other, you know like a mirror.



I went to many places, the tourist spots actually. I wanted to stay low profile and see the places. That's all.


It was really amazing, I refreshed my mind with the history as Istanbul is the historical city. Revised of how Sultan Fatih successfully entered this city, formerly known as Constantinople, Islambol, now is Istanbul. I learned this back in high school, at that time never imagine I will stand in this historical city.

On a different note, I have been thinking and thinking about what is next. I am still thinking, taking into considerations of many factors, looking for other feasible options, and doing the elimination process. It is still foggy, but I am giving myself time, as I don't want to take the decision which I will regret later on.


I will update later on, InsyaAllah.


Till then.


Salam w.b.t.


P/S - I have watched all the Sherlock Holmes seasons. Now I understand why Kanoon loves this series so much.

Personality vs. Attitude

This morning, I had this brief situation with a DD (Directional Driller). For me, DD always have this kind of attitude especially the old-style of DD. They are always,
"You need to do this".
"Make sure this is fixed".
"You should have known this".
And similar things go on and go on. And what makes it more annoying is, they will repeat "We have a problem. We have a problem", many times until I fixed the shit.
Maybe they thought like repeating this mantra, the problem will solve itself.
For me, I will be easily pissed off when I am in that particular situation.
In general, I can see two types of people I work with. And the latter type, they are the people I would be more than to work with again in the future.
Typical person said, "We have a problem. We have a big problem. You need to fix this".
Typical response I will give, "I am not going to do this shit all day".
Awesome person said, "We have an issue. How can we fix this?".
My response will be, "No worries. We will fix this".
Basically, my response is depends on your attitude. Not my attittue.
If you feel that you have problem with it, then fix your attitude first.
What I am trying to deliver here, don't expect people to response positive to you if yourself is being negative.

The history repeats itself

Salam w.b.t and hi all,
I am writing to you guys from the rig - Noble Houston Colbert (NHCO). I arrived yesterday afternoon.
I had lunch and quick meeting with the other MLWD, then had a H2S Drill. At 2.30PM, lay down in the bed while waiting for time to see the Safety Officer. The reason is to get Wifi password.
Then, in 15 minutes I got the Wifi password then there you go. Phone connected and many notifications came in. One of it is a picture in my family Whatsapp group.

From left: Angah, me, and adik

I don't understand at first, and I asked them what is this. Then split second after that, I caught the meaning.
It is happening - again. My sister, Angah is not in a good condition again.
I was calmed at first. I decided to call home. I spoke to Angah, asking what happened and all.
She explained the situation calmly and sounds sad, of course. Only our grandfather (Atok) knows about this so far. They went to see the doctor yesterday morning and shared the news with me afterwards, one hour after I arrived at the rig.
She told me, couple of days back, she went to the clinic at first with my youngest sister - Adek, and the early analysis the doctor said she is pregnant - visual analysis. I know she is not. Doctor felt skeptical or doubt to do further check up since there is no guardian, so, the next day (yesterday) my mother came along. Brought all her medical history and show to the doctor. Then, asked for full scan.
The doctor confirmed, it is a Cyst.
She said, that's when it is confirmed the history repeats itself.
Herself does not feel good, feel hardened in the stomach part, pain, and her period cycle is uncertain. Similar situation happened back in 2016, if I am not mistaken. I was not at home when she undergone surgery at this time. They had to remove one of her ovary, and this time it takes place at her second.
We (woman) only have two, without it, the chance of having kids is nil.
For me, my concern now is her health status and her progress. Also, my mother.
The internet connection was sucks! The phone line keep disconnected. I tried to listen and I had to call many times, and all three different numbers to reach them.
Then, I talked to my mother. She sounded strong at first, I told her, don't worry. I asked her to tell me, if I need to come back. I feel an idiot and selfish when I asked this question. How come I can ask this question..I should be there, with them.
I am dumb - no argument.
Basically, she said, "Benda jadi, kita kena hadapi. Mak tak nak operate, nanti dah takde apa-apa. Cubalah ubat cara ini dulu. Dulu dah buang satu, ini tinggal lagi satu".
"Kalau akak balik pun, takde menda boleh buat. Benda ini bukan boleh dipaksa-paksa keluar".
That's when I can no longer hold my tears. I felt useless. She also cried and immediately passed the phone to my youngest sister - Adek. Then ended the conversation, I told her to take care and let me know if anything. Don't hide it.
I tried to sleep.
Victor (the manager) called this morning, and I asked him how long is he planning to hold me here at the rig - 28 days? He said, no. They are waiting for this MWD to get the paperworks done and I will be relieved in one week. He asked me about my whereabouts previously, my vacation etc. I told him I was at rig Hak-10 for a month, had a vacation in May. I felt reluctant at first, but then I told him I received a bad news from home yesterday. It will be best for me to stay in town instead of at the rig, and if anything I can travel home immediately.
Then he said, give him 5 days. No problem. The reason I told him in advance because I am not planning to put myself in a situation where I will not be able to make a choice later on.
Honestly, I cannot focus.
Three weeks ago, I told my mother, I don't feel good. I don't feel happy, worry. I feel there is something in my heart, that I don't know what cause it. I felt bad. I asked them to be honest, whether everything is good at home. My family especially my mother always try to keep a secret as she does not want me to worry. At that time, she said everything is fine except she is worried as my sister - Angah still looking for a job. That's all. I said, it is ok. No worries, but make sure take care of themselves because I didn't feel good, and I was not sure why.
Then yesterday, when this news broke out, I think this could be the reason why I was not feeling good.
Please make doa my sister will get well and healed completely.
Thank you.
Salam w.b.t.


P/S - La Tahzan

It is me, again.

Salam w.b.t and hey guys,

Apa khabar?

How are you guys doing? All good?

First off, Selamat Hari Raya and Eid Mubarak. I hope you all have a good time with your beloved ones.

How am I doing? It is ok. I spent my whole Ramadhan at the rig and Eid celebration there. I got off the rig last Wednesday after 26 days there. Video taken in the morning of Eid, while I am doing nothing in the unit - Just standby.

Today is my second day in town :)

Yesterday, I went out and spend some ME-time. I went to Doha Festival City, it is a shopping mall actually. I left the apartment around 11AM and came back around 6PM. I watched the Jurassic World, go for shopping, and eat.

The Jurassic World - not that bad actually. When I went there to buy a ticket, I thought there will be a standard seat. Basically, this standard ticket will be around QR30 to QR40. Then, the cashier said well, we only have this VIP and it was QR90. Hurmm…quite expensive. I don’t want to cancel this, so OK.

I would prefer to watch the movie in cinema during odd hours, like working days in the afternoon. So, the seats will be empty on the left and right. Not many noises or phones. However, still some Arabic people being a jerk not silent their phones.

Anyway, I watched the movie and I had a good laugh actually, maybe the Star Lord in there. The cinematic of the movie is awesome and the sound in the theater, DOLBY-ATMOS. Not that bad.

 



Owen and Blue. Cute when small, not too cute when big :p

Then after, I went for window shopping. At least good thing is, there are bookshops in this mall. I googled any malls that have bookshops in it, and this Festival City have it. It is hard to see bookshops here in Qatar, unlike in Aberdeen. If you walk at the shopping lots in Aberdeen or any streets, there will be at least one or two bookshops. The used books, brand new books, writer visit the city, meeting sessions, etc. So, you will have variety of choices to get the book.

Here in Doha, hardly to see one. In City center mall, only small stationery shop and one give card shop. No actual bookstores. Regardless, I went to this bookshop yesterday and I bought this book - Wonder.

 

QR50 yuolls.

I haven't watch the movie yet, so I buy this book. It is been a while I actually buy any book myself. Normally, I will ask my sisters to buy them on behalf of me. "Wonder", it is a good start to read, I don’t want to start with heavy contain books. I want to bring this book to the rig and read it before I sleep. Then, if I manage to finish this, then I will buy another one.

I have been reading less and less book, especially when I am in Doha. I need to improve it. At home, I can finish three 1000pages books in one week. No problem at all.

For food, not that interesting. There are no good restaurants in that mall. Good restaurant for me is like, Spicy food - rice and welcoming. I just went to the food court and eat Rice with Kung Pao chicken. Not tasty, but I was hungry. So, just eat it to fill my stomach. Then, I went to Starbuck get some Frape.

Since I am not planning to come back to this mall, I decided to explore the whole mall. From top to bottom, one end to another. Not many people yet around 4 o'clock, so was good to have a look around. It has two levels only, but it is long. Actually towards, around 4.30pm, I already sleepy. Mind you, I did night shift at the rig for nearly 4 weeks. Thus, I was still adjusting my sleeping time back to normal. It is like a jetlag, and you cannot fix it for just one night. For me, it will normally take 3-4 days to adjust to normal sleeping time. Night to sleep, day to awake.  

So yesterday, I had to drag both my legs to finish the tour in the shopping mall. I know I will be very, very sleepy but I had to fight my sleepiness. At 5PM, I was really struggling, but managed to finish the walk. Around 5.30PM, I took a taxi and straight away went back to my apartment.

Then, straight away sleep until 5AM this morning.

This morning, I did laundry and just chillout. Ah! I forgot to tell you. I will be going to another rig tomorrow, informed about this yesterday morning. I told the person in charge, I just got back from the rig. I thought I will have couple of days in town, just relax. Basically, need to put back all the shites into my offshore bag. They have to send one MWD to relieve this engineer since she already more than 28 days. Same reason I get off from the previous rig, as the client does not allow to stay more than 28 days per hitch. Now, I need to go to another rig to relieve this engineer.

Honestly, I feel tired. Not about job, I think I already feel bored with this kind of cycle.

Wait for job, go for a job, come back from the a job, and wait for a job. The cycle goes on and on. For me, it is already start become a routine.

It is dull.

I know I just got back from a vacation one month ago. However, this is no longer about vacation or so.

I don’t feel happy. I am no longer feel happy with what is going on with me.

Well, I will talk about this but not now.

I think that’s it for now. I don’t have anything particular to share actually. I just write and write.

Take care guys and see you next time.

Salam w.b.t and see you.

P/S - Nothing.